Dear Santa,
As you well know, I've been an extremely good girl this year. Not only have I stopped using my credit cards, but I have also cut down on my spending by eating lunch at home during the week. I really miss Jersey Mikes and Panera Bread and Five Guys Burgers and Fries.
Here is what I want, you jolly old man...
1. A good hair straightener that doesn't cost $15.00 and isn't sold at Wal-Mart. I've heard you can get a decent one at Ulta. (It doesn't even have to be pink.)
2. A houndstooth coat. I realize that basic black might be better, so if you think the houndstooth pattern is a trend, Santa, then I'll understand. Please just choose something that won't show tan doggy hair.
3. There are so many books I'd like to read, Santa. Here are a few that are on my must-read list.
* The Post Secret Books. All of them. I'd prefer if you'd choose copies in which strangers have hand written their own secrets, if it isn't too much trouble.
* The Lacuna by Barbara Kingsolver
* Wishin' and Hopin' by Wally Lamb
* The Little Friend by Donna Tartt
* Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides
* The Almost Moon by Alice Sebold
* The Senator's Wife by Sue Miller
* Any books on the craft of writing that are recommended by the North Pole book shop.
* Any short story anthology of your choosing
Those oughta keep me out of trouble in the early part of '09, Santa.
4. I know it isn't easy to shop for women's clothes, Saint Nick, but this VISA gift card will suffice. I can spend those cold January days at the mall, and it would save you a ton of time.
5. While we're talking about gift cards, you could throw in some for lunch so I don't always have to eat leftovers and Lean Cuisine.
6. I could really use a new digital camera, Claus. I'm not loyal to any particular brand -- I'm sure pretty much everything is an upgrade from my hp Photosmart piece of shit junk. (Sorry, Santa.)
7. Tickets to an Indiana basketball game would be nice, but if you can't make that happen, then could I at least get a pair of candy-striped warm up pants?
8. I'd really like to start applying my foundation with a make-up brush. Can you help make this happen, Santa? Go to the MAC counter; they'll know what to do.
9. Victoria's Secret Love Spell Stuff. Pllllease?!
10. Peace on Earth, goodwill toward men, and new gutters for the house. "Nuff said, right Santa?
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